Ryan received a call from his father on Sunday evening. Suddenly, he was pacing and gasping for air as he fought the words being spoken to him. It seemed wakefulness had just twisted with a nightmare and that we wish it were; just a bad dream. As he mouthed the words to me pain washed over both of us reducing us to slouch on the floor. Ryan's older brother, Ross, had passed away earlier that day. It was completely sudden and unexpected. I remember sitting there and looking out the window. The view appeared the same as always but I wondered how when in an instant our world had just changed so drastically.But, knowing Ross, he wouldn't want us to dwell on the sadness but instead to celebrate his life. Ross was 12 years older then Ryan. Therefore, the traditional brother relationship expanded to include helper and mentor. Ross would never let Ryan forget that he used to change his diaper! Beyond this, he invested himself into Ryan's sports. He would be in the yard teaching him how to throw a ball (and then promptly tackling him and pinning him instantly in a wrestling match; they were brothers after all) and coached many of Ryan's sports teams.
Ryan shared a room with Ross growing up. There dreams dwelling within the same four walls.
One thread that was a constant is Ross' pride for Ryan. He always expressed how proud he was of Ryan for his accomplishments.
Ross was physically built differently than Ryan (of course, this plus the extra 12 years never left Ryan a fighting chance when wrestling :) At one point, Ross had shaved his head and grew a handle bar mustache. At first glance, he looked a bit intimidating.
But then, you'd see the softness in his eyes and his sincere smile and realize he was quite the big teddy bear. Hayden took to him immediately. I remember visiting when Hayden was 22 months old and he thought Ross was so much fun. At one point during the visit, he and Ross were dancing around the room, Hayden's giggles filling the air.
It should not be overlooked that in addition to being great with children, the little old ladies at church were smitten with him.
In July of 2007, Ross married his soul mate, Darci. They truly were the perfect match. Their love for one another was obvious to anybody who would meet them.
Ross will be missed terribly. He was a protective big brother to Ryan and his sister Robin...
A loving husband to Darci....
A fun uncle to his nephews and nieces....
And a devoted son to his parents....
What Ross cared about most was his family.
Here's hoping Heaven for Ross is sitting on a Harley Davidson while watching NASCAR and eating Dirty Daves Pizza. While the world seems dimmer without him here with us, most certainly Heaven is brighter.
